A Graduation Gift

A Graduation Gift

No prayer is too small or too big for God to answer.

Do you feel like God couldn’t possibly care about your prayers? Take heart. He cares about every detail of our lives!

My story of a miraculous college graduation gift I received from God when my parents were a continent away in Nigeria was published in Abba’s Answers. In this devotional book by CrossRiver Media, you’ll find thirty uplifting personal accounts of how God answered prayer.

The interview was fun, and here’s the link (I come on at minute 41.)

Below is my story as it was printed in the anthology.

Graduation Gift

by Debbie Jones Warren

Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. (Lamentations 3:32 NIV)

“Would you pray that my parents can come to my graduation?” I asked the young women in my college Bible study. “My mom and dad are missionaries in Nigeria, and they have a whole year to go, before their next furlough, but we graduate in four months.”

While the other girls would have their parents in the audience applauding this big step in life, mine didn’t have time off. Even if the mission board granted them leave, they had no money for airfare.

I longed for Mom and Dad to share this major milestone with me, so I dared ask for the impossible. In January, I wrote a letter. My parents had no telephone or internet, and my note took four-to-five weeks to reach inland Africa. Their reply traveled back by ocean freighter, forcing me to wait yet another month.

With trembling fingers, I carefully slit open the top of the envelope and pulled out the lined, white stationery bearing my mom’s familiar handwriting. Nothing would make us happier than to be there with you when you graduate, I read. But we just can’t leave right now.

My lower lip trembled as tears blurred the words. In my heart, I heard a heavy iron gate clang shut on my dream.

As a child, I lived in southwestern Nigeria with my missionary family. Our cozy village station lay nestled in a semi-circle of hills studded with rocky outcroppings and savannah brush. But beginning in first grade, I attended boarding school 300 miles away, only returning home for Christmas and summer vacations.

During those lengthy separations from family, I suffered from intense homesickness. Many nights I cried alone in bed, feeling abandoned by God and my parents. By fourth grade, I “toughened up” and accepted that way of life as normal, but the wounds remained.

When I began college in California, my parents continued their work in Nigeria, and the transition to a college dorm proved difficult. I felt constant confusion while trying to assimilate into this new culture.

To numb the ache, I immersed myself in my classes and my job. But I couldn’t ignore the simmering anger. I resented my parents for putting their ministry ahead of me, and I blamed God for my loneliness.

Then I chided myself for wanting my family to live closer. A lot of kids have moved from home to attend universities in other states. I’m so weak and immature. Do I really need Mommy and Daddy at this age? I never had them before.

In my final semester, when I shared my wish with my Bible study friends, my tongue tripped over the words. It seemed like such a petty request.

 “God cares about all our concerns,” my friend Beth said. “He loves to give good gifts.” The girls added me to their prayers.

However, two huge, unspoken questions droned over and over in my mind like helicopters circling above a crime scene: Is God able to break through these impossible barriers? And if He can, does He care enough?

In mid-May, the phone in my apartment kitchen rang. When I heard my father’s voice, I sank into a kitchen chair. Something must be terribly wrong, for him to call long distance.

“Dad? Where are you?” Alarming scenarios whirled through my mind.

“I just landed at San Francisco airport,” He began with his distinct, low drawl. “I need medical treatment for a problem with my prostate.”

“Oh, no.” The words squeaked out while my heart pounded to the beat of an African drum.

He continued with a soft chuckle, adding his trademark humor. “On the bright side, Mom’s here with me. We’ll both be in the stands, whooping and hollering, when you collect your diploma next weekend.”

“I can’t wait to see you. I’ve missed you so much.” Dropping the phone into the cradle, I screamed, “I don’t believe it!”

“What on earth happened?” My roommate poked her head out her bedroom doorway.

“My parents just flew in.” The prickle at the back of my nose signaled I needed a tissue. “While I was praying, God was preparing their way.”

As I hugged my roommate, I silently wondered, how is it possible that God answered my prayer through something as crazy as Dad needing treatment for his prostate?

On the big day, several hundred graduates promenaded through the rows of metal folding chairs on the university football field. Dad and Mom grabbed seats in the closest row, and I heard their voices cheering above everyone else’s.

The next week, Dad had his operation for prostate cancer. While we waited for him to come out of surgery, Mom described the extraordinary circumstances that brought them to California, beginning with Dad’s crisis of pain while driving to a rural village in Nigeria.

“Through God’s perfect timing, we were just an hour from the only hospital in that rural region.” Mom’s eyes had a faraway look as she shook her head and smiled.

Soon our thoughts came back to the present when the UCSF surgeon pushed open the waiting room door. His voice boomed out reassurance. “We got all the cancer!”

After several weeks of rest, Dad and Mom flew back to their teaching ministry in Nigeria, and I started my first full-time job, brimming with confidence that stemmed from my newfound conviction of God’s unfailing love.

Practical Application

In his sovereignty, God sometimes allows loss, loneliness, and grief to touch our lives. But he also brings healing, redemption, and reconciliation. His father-heart is always filled with deep love for us, even though we may not feel it during tough times.

Has there been a point in your life when you felt lost, alone, and abandoned by God or others? How did you cope? What are some ways you’ve seen God providing for you or proving his love to you?

Suggested Prayer Topic

Children of missionaries, medical staff, military personnel, and government workers who live around the world.

You can find the devotional, Abba’s Answers, here. Additionally, you can purchase the full series of four devotional books here

At my college graduation ceremony, I was blessed to meet several Nigerians who had also been attending California State University, Fresno.

#alt=Graduation Gift, debbiejoneswarren.com

9 thoughts on “A Graduation Gift

  1. I loved reading this story! Though we so often don’t understand how God works, or why He works in quite the way He does, we trust and know that He is gracious and faithful. You are a blessing!

    1. It is a wonderful thing to be able to trust that God is gracious and faithful. It has taken me many years of healing to get to this point! Your faith and your faithful writing have been such a blessing in my life.

      1. Hello Debbie, I recently published a blog post entitled, “P. S. Prayers” about an experience I had when I sensed the Holy Spirit ask me, “Is there anything else you want to pray for? ” Based on our shared history of never wanting to overstep our bounds, I think my experience might resonate with you. It’s on my blog at https://christianquietude.wordpress.com

  2. What a wonderful answer to your prayer! I’ve met so many missionary parents that regretted missing one of their MK’s milestones.

  3. Good job relating a miraculous answer to prayer. Btw, I have finally started writing my life story and have written 12 chapters–up to age 20. You really inspired me to get going on it.

What do you think? I would love to hear from you!

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